Teen Sex Information
QUESTION: Teen sex information and birth control -- provide it or not?ANSWER: Running amok along with too much teen sex information bombarding young people today is too much wrong teen sex information. Some of the wrong information includes the inference that young people are nobody unless they have a sexual relationship. As alcohol and pot are depressants and not stimulants, so too, sex used as a stress reliever is bad information for teens. Sex practiced by unmarried teens actually causes more stress and frustrations for themselves. Teens using their skills to socialize hampers their ability to handle bad relationships.
Birth control, provide it or not? Whether parents provide birth control or not, calls for frank discussions between the parent and teen. The discussion will focus on the consequences of sex - from getting pregnant, contracting STDs, to emotional and mental distress. Parents may form a plan of action if teens become pregnant or STDs leave harsh realities. These harsh realities affect the health of the teen and the finances of the family. Some families will face tough decisions on pregnancies - Do we keep the baby, abort the baby, adopt the baby out?
Does birth control give teens a false sense of approval? The teen often takes the provision of birth control by a parent or guardian as a stamp of approval for multiple sexual partners. (Multiple partners may cause early cervical cancer.) This author's research in working with hundreds of preteen and teenagers, found the girls letting the boys know when they started taking birth control. It places a target on the females and more peer pressure on the male students to perform.
Provision for birth control gives the teen a false sense of approval from God, when God prefers to save young lives from the psychological harm of bad premarital sex experiences.
It is also important to note the high statistics of abuse in teen relationships. Abuse can come from the male or female in the relationship. Parents should be aware of the warning signs: look for bruising or abnormal outbursts of rebellion (not associated with previous behavior prior to the relationship). Is abusive language used? Is there respect between the couple? Watch for signs of depression, such as sleeping a lot, changes in eating patterns, loss of interest in their normal activities, or less interaction with their regular friends.
Parents want to determine what types of intervention are needed. Pray for divine guidance to gain courage on how and when to intervene in an abusive teenage relationship. Do not accuse, lay blame, criticize, or raise voices. Advice can be given using soft words or actions, such as laying out reading material, television documentaries, or talk show videos about abuse in teenage sexual relationships. Tell of personal experiences or testimonies of those who have been abused and sought help.
Teens need guidance. Many parents have found a church youth group that can help in spiritually guiding their teens. Active church youth groups give teens their own choice of activities that may help keep teens away from premarital sex. Biblical teachings on sexual behavior should be first and foremost in parent's and youth leaders' agenda for their young people. Look for a church with a strong youth/children's program and find one that matches your philosophy of God/spiritual beliefs. Ask specific questions about the youth leaders' and pastors' viewpoint on teen sexual behavior, abuse, and relationships. Do their beliefs match your philosophy? Is there enough adult supervision to monitor teens'/children's behavior when socializing with each other?
The message, premarital sex and abuse is wrong. The abusive teenage sexual relationship degrades and manipulates the teenager's life. Abuse causes emotional turmoil, which could lead to depression and suicidal thoughts. Parents want to keep bad relationships from affecting their teenagers and these are a few points of teenage sexual information parents can use successfully.
